Tonight, I give myself permission NOT to do homework. I give myself permission to go to bed before 1am. I give myself permission. Whatever I've accomplished today, it's good enough. Whatever I've left undone, it's alright. It will be there tomorrow.
Why is it that I need to give myself permission? Why is it that I need to tell you about it? I don't know about you, but I hold myself to impossible standards. So impossible, that even I can not live up to them. And when I don't live up to them, I beat myself up. I compare myself to other people. I wonder why they seem to be able to do it all and I struggle to finish half of what needs to be done...Does it matter? Does it matter that they have different abilities than me? Does it matter that they seem to need different amounts sleep than I do?
Does it matter? I think it does. I think it does matter...but not how you think it matters. I think it matters that I compare myself to others. I think it matters that somehow, from somewhere those thoughts come into my head. I think it matters that I allow myself the negative self talk. I think it does matter.
Here's something I learned recently: trust your gut. Yeah, I know. Big, giant revelation. See here's the thing. If I can remember the times when I didn't speak up, or couldn't articulate persuasively, but was definitely on to something, it will help me have the courage to speak up when I'm less sure. It's all about keeping that kernel of belief close so that it's right there when you need it. Close, so that you can find it when you need it and use it to give you strength when you don't feel like you have any.
That said, my last weigh-in went very well! I lost 3 pounds by my scale and 4 by theirs. That makes a total weight loss of 13 pounds by my scale and 12.6 pounds by their scale!
2/14/13
whole grain cereal with peaches and raspberries
5 bean casserole and mixed veggies
steak strips and corn
2/15/13
whole grain cereal and fruit cup
salad - with apples, mango, broccoli and cucumbers
This day was rough...I didn't really get to eat all day, and then when I got home, I had to have 2 entrees! I had ravioli and the mushroom risotto.
2/16/13
whole grain cereal and mango
5 bean casserole, mixed veggies and turnip greens
fruit
veggie and fruit platters with hummus
honey graham bar
pasta fagioli
2/17/13
I'm pretty sure I had cereal for breakfast and an apple for a snack
ravioli--cold. I don't recommend it
and mango
sooooo, we had this challenge, to use the HMR chicken soup. I don't recommend it either. I added mixed veggies and a savory chicken entree
2/18/13
5 bean casserole with broccoli and corn
I also had a veggie stew w/ beef and cauliflower
fresh berries and vanilla shake
my first time trying "fake" sweetener so I can drink some black tea!
it's actually darjeeling in the tin, not English Breakfast
navel orange
2/19/13
veggie stew w/ beef, cauliflower and an orange
whole grain cereal with peaches
pasta fagioli, broccoli, and corn
2/20/13
raspberries
whole grain cereal and peaches
chicken pasta parmesean, broccoli, corn, and an orange
carrots
mushroom risotto and mixed veggies
HMR peanut butter bar
2/21/13
whole grain cereal and mangos
carrots
steak strips, broccoli, corn, blood orange
for dinner, I had pasta fagioli and cauliflower
Why is it that I need to give myself permission? Why is it that I need to tell you about it? I don't know about you, but I hold myself to impossible standards. So impossible, that even I can not live up to them. And when I don't live up to them, I beat myself up. I compare myself to other people. I wonder why they seem to be able to do it all and I struggle to finish half of what needs to be done...Does it matter? Does it matter that they have different abilities than me? Does it matter that they seem to need different amounts sleep than I do?
Does it matter? I think it does. I think it does matter...but not how you think it matters. I think it matters that I compare myself to others. I think it matters that somehow, from somewhere those thoughts come into my head. I think it matters that I allow myself the negative self talk. I think it does matter.
Here's something I learned recently: trust your gut. Yeah, I know. Big, giant revelation. See here's the thing. If I can remember the times when I didn't speak up, or couldn't articulate persuasively, but was definitely on to something, it will help me have the courage to speak up when I'm less sure. It's all about keeping that kernel of belief close so that it's right there when you need it. Close, so that you can find it when you need it and use it to give you strength when you don't feel like you have any.
That said, my last weigh-in went very well! I lost 3 pounds by my scale and 4 by theirs. That makes a total weight loss of 13 pounds by my scale and 12.6 pounds by their scale!
whole grain cereal with peaches and raspberries
whole grain cereal and fruit cup
salad - with apples, mango, broccoli and cucumbers
This day was rough...I didn't really get to eat all day, and then when I got home, I had to have 2 entrees! I had ravioli and the mushroom risotto.
whole grain cereal and mango
I'm pretty sure I had cereal for breakfast and an apple for a snack
and mango
5 bean casserole with broccoli and corn
I also had a veggie stew w/ beef and cauliflower
it's actually darjeeling in the tin, not English Breakfast
veggie stew w/ beef, cauliflower and an orange
raspberries
whole grain cereal and mangos
for dinner, I had pasta fagioli and cauliflower
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