Wednesday, August 22, 2012

A better me

And here we are least I've started talking about what's going on. Probably not enough though because I'm not feeling better yet. That's OK, I know I'll reap the benefits when I do the work. It's amazing how that happens. When you do the work, you get the rewards. Simple logic, right? Sure, so why do so many of us resist? Who knows...

Sometimes we get stuck. I mean, at least, I do. Sometimes I get stuck. Overwhelmed. And I don't know what to do. When that happens, I stop taking care of myself. Every muscle in my body tenses up and I become a human sized ball of stress. Then, I stop going to the gym and a whole new set of mental and emotional unpleasantness kicks in. Then, I just start to feel sad, lonely, mentally and emotionally uncomfortable. I really don't like feeling uncomfortable. Does anyone?

You know what? I'm stuck. Right now, today, I'm stuck. There's a few too many things going on and I'm not sure where to start...and the funny thing is that I know it will get better. I know that everything going on right now is giving me the opportunity to be the person I want to become. There's a lesson in all of this. I just wish it were easier to learn. AND, I wish it didn't involve working until 8:30 at night just to get some of the crap done.

When I get in these funks, and I manage to have a moment of clarity, I realize that it's the difficult times in my life that really allow me to shine. Not because I'm at my best, but because those are the times when I learn about myself, my values, my goals and who I want to be. These are the times when my actions speak louder than anything I could ever say. These are the times...these are the times when I learn how to be a woman of honor, dignity, grace. These are the times when I build my personal strength, when I learn to bend without breaking, when I become a better me.


OK...I guess we're starting with dinner. This was supposed to be the start of a healthy trend.
 cake and ice cream for breakfast
nachos for lunch


sushi for dinner...I love my chopsticks from Epcot Center! Good memories.
salad for lunch


fruit, cheese, and crackers for breakfast
 pizza and salad...yummy filet on the salad!!
a berry good snack!


eggs, taters and sausage
 pizza for dinner
salad (that didn't actually get eaten) and pizza for lunch

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