heather's Food bLog: I know who I am

Hmmm, I really don't have a lot to share tonight....so, maybe an update? So far this week, I exercised on Sunday and today...but I generally start my weeks with Monday, so Sunday doesn't really count. I'm planning on working out again tomorrow, though.

I did have some good news on the scale yesterday, but I'm not sure how to share it without giving actual numbers. Besides, I haven't duplicated it....BUT, had my first weigh-in yesterday that was damn near the range where I want to be!!! My thought when I looked at the scale? Now THAT's freedom!! See, if I loose 21 pounds, I'll be at my pre-grad school weight. Mind you, this was also my high school weight. Can you see the attraction of getting there?

Actually, this has me thinking. I can be back at my high school weight, but it sure does look a lot different. I mean, at 17, a person isn't fully grown, right? Who knew that my boobs would keep growing? Who knew that I'd get what I like to call 'birthing hips'? What I didn't know was amazing! I'm just glad to have not gotten cankles...you know, where the calve muscles are so long they extend into the ankles so that there's really no definition between the two.

When I was back at the same weight before grad school, it looked different. I was working out 6 nights a week, usually for 2 hours per night. I had a great combination of cardio and toning/strength. Man! I had great arms and legs!! And I'm, clearly, not ashamed to brag about it. I still had fat around my belly...I guess that comes from being in my 30's, right?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not interested in looking like I'm 17 or 18 again. BUT, there is something very attractive about pushing 40 and being at my high school weight. Think about it! I feel good about my body, I'm healthy, I feel young, and with 20 more years behind me, I know who I am. Can you imagine that level of confidence and knowledge at 18?

Finding out who we are is what happens as we move through our lives and experiences. I don't think anyone truly had an idea of who she was at 17 or 18. I don't know anyone who's life today is exactly what they imagined. As we grow and change we become the people who we are today. Our experiences help us form our views and beliefs that we live today. That moment when you realize that you know who you are is a powerful one. And funny enough, the next instant, it's gone! That's the beauty. We keep growing and changing. Only now, we know enough to appreciate it and embrace it.